A television programme that touched ......
Footprints in the Snow
I've just been watching a programme on television, called "footprints in the snow" and following the true story of a very brave lady called Julie Hill and seeing her trying to adjust to life as a paraplegic following a car accident, and the effects it had on her marriage. The last time I watched it, I was normal, I wasn't a T12 Complete, and I still cried (big softy that I am). Thank God we don't know what lies ahead for us...
It's brilliantly acted as it is with Caroline Quentin and Kevin Whately, oh how it's touched me even more now than before....... 2 years to today, since my accident, remembering how I was before, remembering the pain during the accident, the pain that I have now all day, the indignity of first catheters, and daily manual evacuations by kind nurses (remembering to leave my dignity on the door when in hospital lol), my first spasm, only a few seconds after my fall (ouch to put it mildly) my last one just a few minutes ago, (like my body thinks I'll forget what it's like) my hope that there will be a miracle cure one day that I'll walk, seeing her go through electrodes and operations trying to walk again, seeing them failing to get close to each other, mentally as well as physically. Seeing their love win through... having somebody with you through it all. Being tough on yourself, helping yourself, carrying on, when you really don't want to. Not just remembering life before the accident but living now......... I may not make footprints in the snow ever again, but I'll leave proud tyre marks as I've come this far and I'm still here, changed but here, thanks to medical staff, family and friends and a little bit of stubborness
Chin up, keep smiling
Meira xx
Why now?
TWENTY TWO MONTHS AND EIGHT DAYS
Twenty two months and eight days
all that time since THE accident and it's taken until now
now, of all times to hit me
now
today
this minute.......
this is for life
this is my future
this is me
the wheelchair
not standing
not walking
the pipe
the pain
the spasms
the accidents
for life, for good, for ever
the old Meira has gone
scary, scared, terrified of my future
lack of life
no career
no personality, people see the chair first and foremost
lack of independence
what's to come of me?
But even through this dark time, there are good points
New friends
Knowing my family really do love me
Losing weight...... not that I'd recommend the "brake your back diet" lol
Finding my "true grit"
But mainly, finding that there is a tomorrow, albeit changed.....
tomorrow will come,
tomorrow is new and untouched
tomorrow is for the living
tomorrow is for the new Meira


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