My brothers came to fetch me to bring me to my new interim home, as I can never go back to my real home at Llangernyw with my Mam as it can't be adapted for wheelchair use. So lucky for me I live in Conwy County Borough Council, and they had just developed 6 flats especially adapated for disabled people to live in whilst they have their own homes adapted or until they find a suitable permenant basis, they're lovely plenty of space, if anything it's spoilt me as I have a fall and rise kitchen, "drive through shower" etc, anyhow I knew my wonderful Mam was there making a lovely home made meal to welcome me, after Emrys and Aled left I was so tired that at 7pm I went to bed, sadly though the brakes on my "posh" gpv QUICKIE chair (lol joke of the year, horrendous is the better word for my chair!) where in the wrong place and where the wrong type, and I fell out of my chair whilst transferring to bed, my poor mam was so upset, but I'd falled twice onto hard lino at Gobowen and so never thought anything about it, however my left leg was stuck under me and I turned over on to my stomach and mam had to straighten it out, it looked ok, but had a 4" carpet burn on the front of my ankle and foot LOL, and as we'd been educated in skin care, bowel care, catheter care etc etc before being discharged I was worried, however mam wasn't strong enough to lift my chair into over the other side of the bed as I knew I had an electric hoist and I could use that with the aid of my Mam to get into bed, however we had to call the helpline for help, and lucky old me had 2 lovely ambulance men come to my aid, sadly though they didn't know how to use the hoist so what fun I had training them on how to use it!! Although no pain was coming from the foot my spasms had increased in the night and I was in terrible pain. The following morning my leg was very badly swollen and the skin was getting septic. On the Sunday one of the brilliant district nurses Ruth came to see me as part of my new routine and I explained what had happened, she wanted me to go to A&E at Glan Clwyd, but I declined as I know how busy they are on the weekend. The following morning my leg looked worse, and Ruth the nurse phoned saying she'd been worried about me all night and that she'd asked my Doctor to come out to see me. Doctor Smith took one look at my face and my foot and said to Glan Clwyd immediately I was informed there that I'd broken my tibia and my ankle bone and at 11pm at night was put in the orthopaedic ward, with old ladies, oh the poor things, I tried my best to put them at their ease but they where suffering so much, when my specialist came around he confirmed the 2 fractures and wanted me to stay in for at least a month, I kindly explained that I'd just done 6months and 5 days in hospital before doing the great "escape" and declined his offer, he totally understood but insisted that I came to his fracture clinic every Monday which of course I agreed upon. The first week went well, I only had a " back slab" on so the nurses could change the dressing on the sore,. But when I went back to the first fracture clinic, the specialist said they could see it was healing straight but as I had so much osteoporosis they couldn't see if I was healing (he presumed I'd gone through the menopause, I explained I hadn't and he was in shock as he'd never see such bad osteoporosis before on someone so young LOL) typical me odd again, however they gave me a new back slab, i said farewell to mam and my sister in law insisting that I was fine by myself, anyhow when they left the "wall" hit me about 20 minutes later, that's wha I get for being a stubborn, independant mule, so tried to transfer to bed, lol, (because the backslab had been wet, my sister in law had been helping me to deal with it on my way home and I never thought and I presumed it would be the same as the last one, but this was double the weight, it took me half an hour to get into bed, and could I get my skirt off, no way hose, anyhow my carer was coming in half an hour or so and I waited for her assitance, anyhow she arrives, but says that she can't help as she's only there to make a meal, and I said all I needed was a hand to help lift my leg up, well with a lot of giggling got the skirt off, but when it came to my nicks (My best one's lol) I just told her to get the scissors as she was so out of breath (I think sometimes she needs more care than I do, bless as she's in her 60's) anyhow for days following every time I got up, my foot was black and swollen,(knew my first aid and knew that this was not a good sign)

 I phoned Gobowen an d they said I had to go straight on bed rest! (they wanted me to go in there but the spinal unit was full!)  Bed rest at hospital was bad enough but this was even worse with only a carer in the morning and evening to talk to, of course I had my family but they couldn't be expected to be with me every day, they'd done so much for me, anyhow I sadly suffered from bed sores, bad once and in the end spent over 2 months in bed. When I went back to Gobowen at the beginning of December for my 1st outpatient clinic, they couldn't believe how unlucky I'd been and when they photographed (yes photographed - how embarrassing I hasten to add I didn't send copies out as xmas cards lol) my sores I was told to go back on bed rest for at least 10 days or come in after xmas for 3 months as they where that bad, so I was a good girl and listened, I had 13 of my family coming for xmas dinner so did all my xmas shopping via Argos direct except for a few things that my family got me, I even managed to cook the xmas dinner with all the trimmings as I would normally do, only thing I couldn't do was lift the 20lb turkey out fo the oven by myself. but working as a team we had a fantastic family Christmas and that meant a lot to me, just doing something "normal", something that I would have automaticaly done before the accident, so that was a big "tick" off the long list of things to do.

However, as I'm now living in Llandudno Junction about 10 miles from my home, the visitors slowed down, but especially my closest friends. My brother in law is an accident Solicitor and he advised me to put a claim in but I said I'd been drinking so it would be my fault and there was no point and he said, yes I wouldn't get 100% compo but would be allowed up to 75% and as I was an unison member I'd get free solicitors to deal with my mail. Through out the 8months of my injury no member of the family came to see me, I had one letter from the mother but apart from saying we're thinking of you the letter was all about general things, their daughters upcoming wedding etc of all the letters and cards that I'd received and believe me there are about a thousand of them, this one left me cold..... and upset in a different way.. So I contacted the solicitor BUT made it clear from the start that I didn't think that GE the son had planning permission for the garage renovation and that I wanted to talk to him PERSONALLY before anything went ahead because if they didn't have household public liability insurance then I wouldn't go ahead. I left verbal messages for GE to contact me, I sent him text messages (which he replied once to by asking who this was, as if there where others named Meira with a broken back) anyway this went on for months, until one day my phone rang and it was GE and I was so relieved, he didn't even ask how I was he just said thanks a bunch, and I said what for and he said it was for the letter from my solicitors I said I hadn't given permission for the letter to be sent that I wanted to speak to GE first, he said no comment, I asked him if there was a rail now on the stairs, he said no comment, I asked him for R's full name and address he replied no comment and so it went on. I phoned my Solicitor Mr Ken Jones of Tlicitors and he said he had to write to them because if I'd have spoken to GE I would have believed him if he lied and said he had no insurance cover and I would have dropped the case. However, both my brothers Emrys and Aled work as farm contractors with the parent's father all summer with silage and I didn't want it to affect their working relationship. Anyhow it turns out that GE and his parents weren't on speaking terms at this time and GE had just left the letter on their kitchen table, and so this caused friction. Since then I've been told by numerous people that they've been trying to get proof that I was paralytic on the night in question that I'd been drinking rum and coke all day, I have only twice in my life drank Rum and Coke and that was in a game (that involved x marines lol) and I hate the stuff!! He's even tried to get the taxi driver to say that I'd fallen out of the taxi, luckily for me the taxi driver says he'll be a witness for me that I was more sober than he'd seen me for ages and that he heard R say that he had GE's permission for me to go there as they're trying to get out of it by saying I was breaking the trespassers 1957 rule. he also says he's got CCTV footage of me in a certain pub falling over, I never went in to the said pub on the night in question, I know I've got a bad memory, but not that bad. Anyhow I know we live in a small community and most are brilliant, especially as they've raised thousands of pounds for me by doing a nude calendar with the football club (as I was the secretary before my accident) they've organized concerts, a 10 year old girl volunteered to have her hair shaved and raised over a £1,000 all by herself. I don't know where to start saying thank you. However the amount of visitors coming to see me has nearly stopped, I can understand as everybody's so busy with their own lives, but also some can't cope in seeing me in my chair. Since my accident I have only drank on 3 occasions. I am so lonely, I am scared, and I don't have that special someone to lean on, and I won't meet anyone now, it was bad enough being blonde, fat and forty but to be blonde, fat, forty one in a wheelchair with a 12" pipe sticking out of me well.......... it says it all.

I'm sorry to go on and on, but this is only a part of what I've been through in the last 20 months and have found this quite theraputic, albeit boring and nothing new to all you brave people that have gotten on with their lives (your stories are truly inspirational). Worst of all my poor mother is suffering she's got a bad hip and the specialist lost her notes and she's got so bad that she's walking with a stick and as we have always liked to go shopping on a Saturday I feel guilty seeing her having to lift this 19kg chair of mine in and out of her car, so have been making excuses lately not to go out, but of course this is making me stir crazy as I'm stuck in this flat, in pain and alone.  But we've now been informed that she's having her new hip the day after boxing day (so that will be a great christmas present, no pain!! HOPEFULLY. God bless the poor thing, she's been a carer for my father who passed away 20 years ago, and although I lived with her before my accident I dont want her to be my carer as it's not fair on her, once was bad enough, Dad ended his life also in a wheelchair, but due to farmes lung developing into emphysemia and on oxygen 24/7. had heart attacks, angnina, pneumonia, bronchitis, stomach ulcers, bad nerves, 28 tablets a day and inhalers, let alone the oxygen piped through the house,  spent months at a time in hospital, he was given 4 years to live and lived 16, now he was an athlete of a man, but he never gave up and never stopped smilng, TRUE GRIT and it's taken me until my accident to realise that a bit of my dad has rubbed off on me......)

I sent a text to one of my best friends a few weeks ago to ask about her Mam and Uncle who haven't been well lately. I had no reply. So sent another one 2 days later apologising that I hadn't been in touch earlier as had a bad few weeks (have been having panic attacks, apparently it's Post Traumatic Stress which has been triggered off as I was due to have an MRI on my wrists as they're starting to go, I've also got a painful stone on my kidney and waiting for an ultrasound on that also don't laugh I've got piles as well and am waiting for an endoscope) so I said I hoped I haven't upset her, and she replied by saying "THAT SHE DIDN'T LIKE WHAT I WAS DOING TO THE FAMILY" this triggered another 2 panic attacks, and explains why she and some other best friends of mine haven't been to see me since xmas, however if it had been a car accident nobody would ever say anything if I was claiming after that. I was dying to reply to the text but refrained. The parents haven't had to pay anything from their own pocket, they may lose their no claims bonus, but that's it. The only trouble they've had is THEIR OWN INSURANCE company have been moidering them with telephone calls and letters to up their premium to three million??? Where they've had this number from is unbeknown to me or my solicitor, in the end my own brother and MY solicitor have had to talk to their insurers to stop hassling the family. I have had to agree that I won't be taking it to the Court (I couldn't deal with the stress of that in any case) and also, that say the out of court settlement is for £125,000 and their insurance is only for a £100,000 ( I have no idea how much their cover is for and do not wish to know) then I've promised not to sue them personally for the difference as I believe you can (I'd never even heard of that). I big softie that I am, on hearing that GE and his girlfriend had twins, one girl and a boy I sent a congratulations text, saying well done, you've got a rugby player for the girl and male teams at Nant Conwy in one go and wished them all well, I had a text back saying it would be very hard for them as they where struggling to pay my solicitors fees, thanks!! So I replied, please GE don't be like this, I don't want any bad feeling between us, I'll never walk again, I've lost my home, I've lost my job, I've lost friends, I'm depressed, I have a 12 inch pipe sticking out of me, I have bowel accidents and I really can't cope any more, and I said he'd had the most precious gift in the world in having children and having a soulmate to love him, I can't even have that, and asked him please please to stop this. I did not get a reply!! (believe me some of my family don't know about the bowels and the pipe so for me to tell him that was really, really hard!!) If my friends are believing what the family are saying about me, what are other people that don't know me thinking, I've found a housing association bungalow opposite my mothers house in Llangernyw but the grant application has to be approved by the National Assembly I'm really praying now that that won't be approved so that I don't have to move back into the village, I am terrified of causing a scene or being the centre of all the gossip. I've got enough on my plate to put it mildly, and I've really had enough, if it wasn't for my Mam and six nephews and nieces well I wouldn't be here, that's how down I am, but have to think on the positive side. and I'm still smiling and getting on with my life well just..... once I get a smaller chair, which will then mean I can get a car then I can really start to live an independent life again, well nearly....... then hopefully I can move on...  onwards and upwards, well rolling along lol

Have any of you lost friends? Had problems with a claim affecting your friendship etc??