250608 Dodgy piss bags

I was about to go out when I noticed that my shorts were damp. Now was this due to my hand washing or a leaking piss bag? I got on my way and it was clear it was the valve above the bag. I could see my pee gurgling through.

I phoned up H, she was in Bury. I phoned Bob and no answer. I sat there with my sheba towel absorbing my flowing piss. It was warm and an hour later Bob came and very easily changed my piss bag.  

Whilst I was there , Gardener-man came down the drive and in his white-van he was trying to sell  me box plants and wooden garden furniture.

Cheryl came for my first physio for a while and I managed to do 4*1 laps, which both pleased and amazed me. After this hard work, she cooked me a “snack of monkfish. Gorgeous. She had bought me seeds for my raised bed. Now I can grow spring onions for spring.

 

240608 Another sunny day

 

Now what am I supposed to think ? Yesterday DP counted the knotweed shoots at 6. today GP couldn't even find them.?. still not 100% clear we have them. I will send cuttings to GP when we zap them.

After fiddling around in a sea of indecisiveness I finally called “Clarkes of Walsham” to order stuff for the raised bed. My agreed strategy is to sort the bed out then order and fix the paving after. It seemed very technical when DP did his professional drawings.!! Problems then come.

                Firstly the sleepers we have are a different size and colour. I soon gave up trying to match them. Secondly they dot cut then anymore. What amazed me was the unavailability of a 5 mm masonry drill. (later DP “oh great technical man” explained that the imperial equiv meant that their product list will have had 5.5 mm and so they saw no 5mm as my Swiss one !) It will all be delivered tomorrow.

                The “problem” with a very good friend likedp, comes whn you ry to use my unskilled Grasham to do things. Firstly the tools I have are not always the best, the newest of in the best nick. “Jut let me do it” is too easy to bend too. I prefer to ask him to do the skilled stuff.

I phoned Neil at BMW to give him a bollocking. He ½ took the ind wind out of my sails by saying that the  1 sq cm piece of plastic that had fallen off the £29,000 car was being repainted. He promised to call H to stun her with the good news. Suprise not…he didn't.

Grizz came for food. On his insistence he brought the meat. We didn't have the heart to tell him we hadn’t eaten his chosen pork for 25 years.  

 

 

230608 Weather improving.

 

The week’s weather looks very MJ friendly at 15 degrees but sunny.

 

As if I didn't understand already, money motivates.

As if I didn't understand already, teenagers wanting to get on well in life WILL work.

As if I didn't understand already, people don’t need to work QUICK to be working HARD.

As if I didn't understand already, fair days work for a fair days pay means harmony.

 

On recommendation from a number of people I thought I’d give Graham a try. He came to do a number of “blue” asks on my list. These tasks are unskilled and he did well, extending and clearing up the poo areas and giving the trees their annual 5,000 mile service of taking the straps to the posts, loosening removing straps. Seemed to get the hang very quickly and ii hope he is keen to continue. The more he works here, I’m sure the split between green-skilled and blue-unskilled will become hazy.  

For the second time since the accident I took cash out of the machine in Harleston. For the first time I was slightly disappointed by my fish meal, this time smoked haddock, at JD Youngs. Steve was great company and can't really accept that he is attractive to women or what to do about it !!

 

After a great party with H’s riends I was tolo they weee coming 4 luch. Yippee ….girls tpo flirt witrh

 

 

220608 Mervyn’s 60^th birthday party

 

After last nights stomach explosions, which poor H had to clear up, I was very nervous to go out much more than see my raised bed and steam water my cuttings. Bramble confused me by demanding to play ball, but indecisively decided to run after the balls…...she is very fussy about which ball she will chase. I had no breakfast and virtually no lunch.

                We were picked up by Mark, my gardener, who is also a taxi driver, his Citroen car was easy to get into, with wide doors and a far back seat. To get out, with a high seat, was also easy. We went to Mervyn’s house off the Thetford road, near Roydon. His house is on a big plot with many external buildings AND the hugest pond you ever saw. Not a lake, more an Ocean. His garden was well managed and a huge Penstemon particularly impressed me.

                We sat outside in the bright sunshine, accompanied by the gusty wind. At 6 we were guided into a huge shed in which the catering and booze was laid out. H’s gym friends and Mick the personal trainer were great company and we had a great laugh and enjoyed the background of the noisy Jazz band.

 

 

210608 Weather and party planning

I was woken and helped up by Bob to get into watching England getting thrashed by the All Blacks

In the evening, Mr and Mrs Rappers came for dinner. For 4 hours I didn't stop laughing. Great fun.

 

200608 Avon bulbs

I had discussed my bulb list with Mark the gardener and his only comment ? You haven't bought enough tulips. Thus I approached the brochure with the intention of getting some more. So what to get? H fashion advice was “Dark and bright” colours…so I went for reds, purples, mauves. Eventually, decisions made, I phoned them. I referred to a picture in the brochure with crocus AND tulips together in flower.

I asked their advice on pairing up and they said they would research then phone back, which they duly did. The only ones I chose were the red tulips with white crocus as shown in the brochure. Nothing else seemed as good.  Having made a big order initially then doubling it, I think I will get the rest from DGC in the autumn.

Marion, my newly moved in, Scottish gardening, neighbour popped in for a chat and coffee. Nice lady. I phoned “Mulch Mark” my tree surgeon, about him returning to clear out the West hedge of even more Elm , nearly dead, but very tall, dead trees. He announced that he was another bloke whose wife has walked out of him 2 weeks ago. My list of 15 broken marriages is dominated by female decisions and infidelity rather than blokes and their secretaries. Life has moved on.

Bo and I went to Ipswich for our monthly cinema and pasta evening. I chose “Teeth” based on a R5 recommendation. We were disappointed. As for our pasta….gorgeous.

Whilst we were there I was blanked by god-daughter, Sarah. It was weird. Her brother and grand-father came over to introduce themselves. I had my back to the restaurant preferring to face the wall and just assumed that it was only the two of them and that Sarah wasn’t even there. As they moved away I asked Bo,  who confirmed that YES Sarah was there. In the morning I called her to tell her how pissed off I was, with her  

 

190608 White van man/Postman

Not driving, really motivates me to seek out delivery from “whitevan man” or postman. All of them are great at delivering packages onto kitchen surfaces, opening post etc and having chats too.

Paul/Grizz phoned and I told him the **** he was in with H after not turning up on Tuesday. He tried to phone her, but kept calling me instead. Whilst there looking at roadside sales of vegetables, my new friend Marion, climbed over me and emptied the stall. None left 4 me. I commented thus in my normal subtle diplomatic way. Marion took the hint and to seek further volume, knocked on the door and Andy looked at me and shut the door. Friendly

Mark the gardener was here to plant all of my recently purchased from Garry & Mary. The earth in MJ bed really looks very fertile, hopefully as a result of the masses of horse poo we laid on it. Chris-Fish turned up and I bought loads of halibut.  

Following conversations with Steve Thorpe (son of Lake man, Peter and mother June), I had called a recently laid-off lad, 17 year old Graham. “When can you come up?”…….”Now”…good start and impressive.  His dad bought him up here to talk. With their 6 month old shepherd dog, I saw a normal sized young man, very keen to earn some money. We agreed to start Monday morning on clearing up the barbed wire. Negotiating his salary was not his strength, so after finding he was earning £6 per hour, I offered £7 per hour. Let’s hope he delivers.

 

180608 Buying some land.

I had not really talked to my neighbour above pleasantries, in the 3 years we have lived here. We have never shared a meal and the highlight was inviting the whole family for coffee and cakes over our first Christmas 2004. In the meanwhile communication has been limited to us screaming at each other whilst he cleared up Donkey poo. One morning I was out with Bramble and Alan was strimming his roadside hedge. A quick “Hi” suddenly developed into a 30 minute conversation on his donkeys, the use of his western block, his external nursery etc. he never asked ONE question.

                Once home, I thought “If he doesn't want them, will he sell them to me?”. To improve my chances he had agreed us spraying his thistles and pulling my fence down, now that the hedge has grown to 4 feet. I phoned him and he “Well no” he wasn’t insulted and I told him to put the ideas in his “Look at in 10 years” list. Rumours locally that his house is for sale, but there is no evidence of it. .

 

 

1706 Backstreet passes

I finally saw Garry & Mary socially chez moi!!. They came to deliver my “invoice” and £20 for the commission on the sale of £200 plants. (so it wasn’t a bad day for them). They clearly don’t want to come in and have a coffee as they seem very nervous around us. I wonder why people treat us as so different to them? Sort of “Upstairs Downstairs” sort of thing

I trekked out for a walk with Bramble and only got as far as Mick & Fiona who have a Golden lab aged 8 months. With a pond in the middle of their garden the dogs did their best to exhaust each other and cover Mick with muddy water.

                Mick is only 53 but he has retired from his previous profession of Stage Manager on music tours. To celebrate his memories he proudly showed off his very extensive and impressive “Backstage passes” 30 of which were framed on each of 7 frames. So there were over 200 examples over the 70-80-90-00’s. Guess how many tours I had been to? Well 2 definitely !!! “U2 Joshua Tree” AND “David Bowie Glass Spider”…both gigs I saw at Milton Keynes Bowl. This summed his clients up. Mostly bigger than my favourite bands. He had two others of my favourite bands which I could not be sure…Undertones 1980 and Cure 1983….was I there? Who knows? I fear a few more conversations with him, which we will enjoy, but would bore everyone else.

I entered Bramble and I in the “Rushall Dog show”, after agreeing with DJK what we would do that weekend.

June came round to gain sponsorship for her breast cancer supporting Sunday afternoon tractor drive. Was she another one nervous of being here ?

                On top of our normal guest for Tuesday night, DP , H had invited Grizz/Long beard to eat with us only on Sunday night. By 19.30 it was clear he wasn’t coming so we ate without him. Another one nervous of being here ?

 DP was very lively and seemed to be discussing something with H which clearlt exclusded me.

 

1606 Birthday

Well birthday lists work “!”!! I got music dvds of Cure, Faithless. Chemical Brothers and Clash. Good stuff. I also got cds that were on my wishlist which included Brett Anderson, BBC soundtrack for “Ashes to Ashes” and “Life on Mars” plus DVD for the recent “Wild China”

John Seeley continued his 20 year tradition of finding me an unusual BT interesting book. I will really enjoy my furthering education this time on Afghanistan. He has bought me some great books on this part of then world. Good stuff

H really had to bend DP’s arm for him to share my birthday lunch. So I had half portions of monkfish and beans. He really is a great friend.

 

 

1506 Open day : looking forward to it and it didn't disappoint !!

What a fantastic day. The forecvast was sunny cool and a few showers. I decidsed on a shorts!! Brave !

 

Gary and Mary were here at 10.00 to set up their plant stall. The more they unloaded the more I thought it was professional, large and much choice. During the day I didn't see much action for them. At the end ofd the day I asked them how it went. The key question was “Will you come back in two years, for our next one?”……”        Yes”….and that answer way good enough for me.

The official day started at 11.00 and with everyone being urged to go to the church to buy their tickets, it was 30 minutes later before our first guest arrived. Welcomed by a short wearing, piss bag on leg using, MJ with a short “Welcome to Mulberry Barn”. People looked at the meadow, now at its peak, and scarcley glanced at the beds!!

One of the key attractions, for our garden and maybe for the whole event was Sophie and limping Jade offering kids horse rides. I was no0t able to get over and see the destruction of the meadow, so I asked DP to take my camera an take a few shoots for me. Brilliantly they raised £36

Next was Carolyn selling ice cream on behalf of CAB. She bought £42 “home-made” ice cream made by a local itaslian firm. She managed a £37 profit at £1 for each ice cream. She just about sold out but I think the price was too low.

In the evening, for 19.00, we and supporters were invited to the party at Martin and Jane’s manor house. We had managed to persuade Sally, Paul and kids to attend. We met up with Bob and Ruth at MB and Sophie pushed me over there. It was great top meet a few new faces, highlighted by Marian and ex-professional union star from Harlequins, Ian. This Scottish couple are great additions tom our village.

Paul, “Long beard” or now “Grizz” was there and insisted on taking me on a tour of the garden. Could he be the replacement for Duffy ? who was about the back down/resign in preparation for the birth of his second child.

A photographer, with all the gear, turned up to see David’s NG kit car. He then tried to persuade him to take some photos in the meadow.

Two grumps  People driving down the drive rater than using the bus or walking. Friends visitimng and NOT offering to pay.

Sophie then gave H and I leather wrist bands from her recent Turkish holiday. Very generous. I think the first pressie our friends’ kids had bought us with their own money. Fantastic.

Lessons learnt:  Signs for the walk behind garage AND Cheaper plants looking less professional OR MJ stuff for sale. MJ do the plants ??

 

 

1406

Bnob wake up and breakfast

Rugby eng ajd wales

Potting on and out

Mark happy

Sally nikita patsey jade * 2

Jade ankle

Martin and jenny courgette take herbs + cornus

Postman delivery straight in when I was eating

Open day deliveries bus fete

Northern bloke brafdford northern

DP

 

 

140608 Language teaching

 

One of the reasons, I think, I was asked to be a school governor, was to help them with introduction of foreign language teaching to primary school kids. Call me sensitive if you will but I really get the feeling the head is nervous, bureaucratic etc on this. He is normally “Adult “ on this. Hem seems to be reluctant to take the lead and throw the rules away and forsake traditional, crap a failing language learning

The aim for the kids, I think, is to instil a pleasure, enjoyment and lack of fear, a sense of fun in learning a “strange” language. He has missed a great opportunity with the European Football championships to introduce both French and German. Get them used to hearing foreign sounds, radio, TV, music etc. Mimicking sounds and not grammar learning. To get used to making fools of themselves when they are young, fearless and not yet image conscious. They will learn the best, the younger he starts.

Two days before my birthday, I was interrupted from concentrated PC work to go outside and welcome the delivery of 2 of my birthday pressies. DP had his trailer attached to his Land Rover, and within it a pallet of concrete paving blocks good lad. Now that’s a good job for Duffy

Then I was led, hands over my eyes to meet “Fred” my crouching statue, now outside my shower window, to be moved to the pond………………….maybe  

 

1306 Bramble is “Dog napped”

Writing this might make me cry. Bob and I went around the plot to investigate whether he could cut the grass with his mower, and how long it would take.  Bramble, of course, came around for the tour too. When we crossed to the fence hedge, she was zapped by the Petsafe security wire. We commented her re-action but basically left her to it (whatever “it” means)

Inside, da-di-da, 2 hours passed

“Where is Bramble “one of us asked….we went outside to look, call, rattle her food bucket….NOTHNG. Not a whimper, whine, bark. Started to worry. As we’d seen her zapped, how could she of got off the plot? Had someone nabbed her ? I phoned the Police.. I phoned the direct no of Cyndy (jogger) or Ian. Neither was there

                “If my dog has been nabbed, what happens next?”

I spoke to Francis who did her best to calm me and asked me to call before her change of shift at 0700. As Bob was leaving JW turned up and resumed without success searching for Bramble by circum-navigating the plot……where was she? By now we were getting hungry, looking forward to Half Moon portions of fish and chips.

Ruth phoned and suggested bringing the borders to see if they could find her. Suddenly we saw them at the end of the drive and

“My god she is here!”…

heart flutters, nerves…could they really have found her? And that easily? I could hear Bob calling her and then he moved 5m and picked her up. put her on the drive and then she sprinted down towards us by the garage,. She was as excited, relieved and happy to see her as visa-versa. What the hell had happened for 4 hours ?

Post note/ : we think she was stuck between the zap zone and the rabbit fence. She had reverted to dog instinct cos she was scared. She must have heard us, but she was terrified to move. Why she didn't even bark, I will never know.

Cheryl ½+1/1+1

 

1206 Strange but interesting Blogs : Nazi bunkers

 

 

An amazing blog following the Jersey resident who has discovered a Nazi bunker in this back garden.

 

Customer service is defined by many things. People’sd beliefs about “What is right”, commercial interest and what the boss wants to name three. Chris-Fish changed his route to come and see us at 10.00. This detour to our house was necessary because I'm out at 15.00 to the wind farm meeting at the time he would normally come. He detoured gladly sand it was much appreciated. Wewent into a jewellers recently to think about  H’s Xmas pressie. Yes, birthday already sorted and this was just an idea whilst in Norwich to buy DP a Rolex. Maria dutifully howed us her necklace andexplained that nother customer had trid  to buy it off her neck. She had refused.

                Today was the Tivetshall windfarm presentation at their village hall. What a waste of time. It’s a shame Lucy wasn’t there to liven it up. Her Northern Irish tones and directness would have been great. She says that only we English accuse her of bluntness and that its normal in Ireland. I can't judge that.  

 

 

1106 Wanker banks

 

Cheryl  came for a poor physio of 1 and 3*1/2. I know its `a helluva weak excuse, but I was put off by H watching and playing ball with Bramble.

Off to Norwich for a few pressies for my god son, his sister and his mum (my fathers’s cousin’s daughter). Both the kids got chocolate from Hotel chocolate, where as they were serving hazelnut choccies, I didn't join the feeding frenzy of the freebies as normal.  

We speedily moved on to the jewellers to pick up some repairs.

                Once home we had a great cabbage salad and then got fixed up for a Swisstrak trip. Bugger!! the battery was only half full. Planning only a short trip because of it, I got ¼ way on a short trip before the battery gauge started dropping down too quickly. I turned around and as I entered my drive, the battery gauge was flashing and beeping. Thinking the batteries were knackered, DP offered to check the charger. Before we even got screwdrivers ready, he discovered that someone (Gordy?) had turned the switch off. 

Money from CH took Thursday order to Tuesday arrival. How come it takes so  long?

1006 Impressive women.

Fiona Ryder, our new neighbour came to visit. I had predicted H would like her. I was right. She is a borne entrepreneur, builing up and selling businesses. She was a very impressive woman

CAB fund raising was the sole topic tonight of a new group I’d been asked to chair. Dianne was surprisingly aggressive. They certainly didn't like my joke.

                The fox and goose phoned back to confirm the date for lunch on H’s birthday.

 

0906 stomach

After more thoughts about what makes me have scvummy bottom inb the UK, but not during one month rehab in CH, I decided to stop taking my vitamins. I will wait for a monbth and see what happens. After last nightrs gut explosion and colonial cleatr out I decifded NOT to tske Movicol for at least a day either.

As stomach not stable I decided to not go to the governors meeting where I had expected to spesak about the lack of language teaching. I also persuaded JD to bring bread and cheese instead of going out. Lovely blue cheese and great French bread with a chewy crust.

 

0806 Jez is good value.

 

DP woke me and got me up for breakfast and a shower.i have NEVER seen someonber curt brea d vso professionally. I wrongly assumed he’d got a machine to cut it so well.

Cheryl came for another poor session and after a poo we got on our way to Jez in Ipswich with Bramble. En route we found ourselves in the middle of the “Tour de Hasleworth” bike race. Despite seeing NO bikes we were forced by the nice policeman to make a major detour to Yoxford .An hour late (early compared to our hosts normal practice) we arrived hungry for our well prepared, healthy and suitably under-cooked stir fry and pasta. It was gorgeous. Well chosen beans, chicken, peppers and pasta.

Jez is a handsome, kind, thoughtful and generous mate. The mystery is simply why he is single?. He is living in the middle of Ipswich's single shag palace land. His shaven head and extremely fit muscle bound torso must give an impression that he is a fug. (thug). How false. He would make both a fab partner and father. At 40 he is unfortunately reluctant to take on a girl with “baggage”. How many of us, >40, have NO baggage?

 

0706 DP paying again

Dianne and Gordie left just before lunch after leaving me a plate of salad. There was nothing wrong with the salad, it was very healthy and nutritious, but it wasn’t an H salad with a different taste in every corner or under every bit of lettuce.

DP arrived an hour early, hungry and keen to go out As normal JD Youngs didn't disappoint, with my Red Snapper, DP’s curry and Jo’s pork medallions. We all had good puddings too. This time there was 2 of them, so surprisingly for DP, I accepted , without a whimper his “My turn” offer to pay!! At least I managed to pay for the fish on Thursday. Who could ever disentangle all the cash movements to work out who is in credit? As long as he is happy then so am I !!.

They saw me to bed.

 

0606 Google Earth

Cheryl came for a session. It was rained off.

Having bought Halibut from Chris-Fish on Thursday, Cheryl finally phoned her fish order in, only to find him gone. I recommended she called him on the way home as he would probably make a small detour to her, as he knows she would make a significant purchase. She didn't disapoiint. She spent £40 on the rest of the halibut and also some monkfish.  

Gordon / Diane have been very generous to come and spend Thursday and Friday night with me to help whilst H went to Alicante with Sonia and Karen. Known since Feb 1989, my first day at Mars in Kings Lynn, they have visited frequently even just after my accident whilst I was in hospital. She is the only member of the “MJ is a great boss” club. That does NOT say I was great, merely that there are even worse!!

In the afternoon I introduced them to the wonders of Google Earth. Gordon quickly picked it up and phoned one of his friends about the scars in his field, where he had dumped some waste. Could be a useful use for identifying scars on the landscape.